March 30, 2015

100Days That Will Change Your Life

100Day ChallengeEvery once in a while I receive a note or an encouraging, grateful word.  This week, I received an email I had to share.  I am so pleased to share this with you, not because of the kinds words about 100Pedals; but, because this mom changed her life following the very simple, foundational principle so few truly understand or embrace.

I wanted to thank you so much for helping me. Earlier this year I had the opportunity to hear you speak about 100 Pedals at the ‘For the Love of Connor‘ event. I also had the opportunity to talk with you for a few minutes after the program.

You asked for an update when I told you I was going to give your 100Day challenge a try. Today is DAY 50!

In December of 2013 my youngest child, died after a 12 year battle with cancer, at the age of 32. December of 2013 was much a blur, I got through it as if I was walking through a fog. Last winter I spent many days in bed, gradually functioning, minimally, in the routine of daily life.

December of 2014 arrived, (on schedule of course!) and my life seemed to come to a screeching halt. My son’s birthday, the anniversary of his death, Christmas, and all festivities that accompany the holidays were too much.

In January I again found myself going down into a very dark hole and wondering if I could ever find my ‘new normal and get myself out of that hole. When my cousin asked me, I agreed to attend the ‘For the Love of Connor‘ event and I’m not even sure why I said ‘yes’. In retrospect, I was meant to be there!

I decided to make your idea my own. Every Sunday I plan my daily ‘me time’. One hour each day is used to focus on my physical, emotional and/or spiritual well being. Negative thoughts are not allowed – change to positive is a must. For example, if negative thoughts of of my son’s death come to my mind, I make myself think about his smile, his antics when he was a little one, etc. I think about the wonderful things that I experienced with my son. Also, I try very hard to think about different, “happier” aspects of my life during this ‘me time’. I walk, meditate, read, ride a bike, dance, have had a massage, ‘pay it forward’, listen to music, and have been known to do some “retail therapy” for new pair of shoes!

At first, it was difficult. The whole mediation thing lasted about 5minutes. I’m still working on that, up to about 20minutes, but I think it has more to do with my personality than trying to work through grief. (Yoga is way too slow for me too!)

Today is DAY 50 and I am doing so much better. For example, March 6th, the 15 month anniversary of my son’s death…On the previous evening as I was preparing to get to sleep, I was thinking about what the next day would be like. 15 months and sometimes it feels as if it was yesterday and sometimes it feels as if it has always has been. The morning of the 6th, I woke up and was thinking about and visualizing my son and his best friend laughing. From the time they formed their friendship, in the fourth grade, into adulthood, they always laughed as if they were sharing a secret or were ‘up to something’! It was such a wonderful way to start what could have been a tough day. Ironically, I had a message from my son’s friend that morning, telling me he was thinking of me!

My ‘me time’, for that special hour each day, has affected my thinking and behaviors during the other 23 hours of each day!!

I am keenly aware that my life will never be the same. But, guess what? I can laugh again! And my ‘new normal’ now includes a feeling of moving forward in a positive, productive, and loving manner. My steps towards healing are headed in a great direction.

I don’t believe that we often have the opportunity to hear what a profound effect we have on others. I wanted you to know what a positive light you have been for me. I am so glad I attended the event earlier this year and so very grateful that I met you. I am sincerely thankful for your influence in my healing process.

Again, thank you.
SK – Phoenix, AZ

The 100Day Challenge is an awesome program for transforming a life devastated by a painful or ongoing chaotic experience.  The concept is simple – do something positive for yourself every single day to escape the chaos, the pain the negativity.  Use that moment of peaceful tranquility to guide and influence your thoughts going forward.  Do this for 100 consecutive days.  Keep a journal.  Embrace the experience.  Grow with each step as you move away from your pain.

Powerful transformations do not require big, bold goals or activities; they are achieved through a systematic application of little, productive and positive steps.  Take care of yourself now and your life will be changed.  Peace!

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Are you a member of an organization who would benefit from a powerful, authentic and moving story? Would you like to hear Dave Cooke share his incredible, inspiring transformational journey through his son’s heroin addiction to a life of peace and clarity?  Dave gives talks to groups large and small throughout the country.  To book Dave for your next event, program, or meeting contact him at 602.903.2074 or via email.

Are you on my email list? If you’d like to receive my monthly newsletter for the parents of children addicted to drugs/alcohol and weekly blog post notifications, email me.

 

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About Dave Cooke

Dave Cooke is a dad on a mission. His mission is to help parents get control of their lives over the powerful, destructive influences of a child's addiction. As the father of a son in a ten year heroin battle, Dave knows all to well the challenges parents and families face. He also knows there is a way to find peace in the chaos. It is his mission to help parents discover their path to a healthier, balanced life even if a child's active addiction is still part of their daily journey.

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