It Starts with Humility

“Courage, strength and perseverance are best discovered through the humbling awareness that you cannot win your battles on your own.”

Over the past few weeks, I have started to reflect on the lessons and experiences from this past year. I have learned a great, accomplished even more, and I have enjoyed sharing and celebrating everything about 100 Pedals. Originally, I believed that the lessons learned in 100 Pedals were all about accomplishment and goal setting, etc. And, in many cases the by product of these lessons has provided me a stronger platform from which I can establish and achieve incredible outcomes. However, there is more to the 100 Pedals experience that simply setting and achieving goals.

The real accomplishment of 100 Pedals is more about what I learned than what I accomplished. 100 Pedals taught me how to discover and leverage those resources that would help me find the strength, the energy and the focus to keep moving and overcome the obstacles in front of me. The gift of 100 Pedals is the lessons in the journey for which I am grateful and happy to share.

Finding the strength to overcome the challenges we face starts with accepting with humility the fact that we cannot do it ourselves, that we do not have all the answers, and that we are not alone in our battles. When something really painful happens in our life, it is okay to ask for help. It is alright to admit we need someone else’s assistance. There is no reason to fight the battle alone.

It is the experiences, the unique skills, and the love and kindness of others that will help us discover our way through a challenge. The challenge is finding the humility to ask for help. For some reason, we think that we cannot admit to our friends, our family, or even to a stranger the fact that we are dealing with something that feels bigger or badder than us. This is the misconception of our challenges — we do not have to deal with them ourselves.

When I first started dealing with Brandon’s addiction challenges and first engaged in my 100 Pedals rides, I felt like I was the only soldier in the battle. This was my fight and I alone had to figure out a way to win the war. Little did I realize or notice all the people who were introducing themselves to me and how they were making themselves available to help me. Although they offered their support, their concern, their advice, and their prayers, I felt like I was the only guy in the fight.

As I started sharing my story and became more engaged in the energy and inspiration of the rides, I realized that I had an entire army of people who were there for me. It was only when I reached that point in the battle where I allowed myself to be open, honest, and receptive to their love, their insights, and their positive energy was I able to engage in the promise and opportunity of my adventure.

Being humble is not a weakness, it is a gift. Through our humility we are able to be real, be open, be receptive, and be accessible to others. It is in our humility that we actually find the real strength and wisdom to move forward with the power and support of others.

Next time you find yourself stuck — in pain, at a loss, or in distress — remember the best place to fight that battle is with the support, love, guidance and strength of others. Do not be afraid to ask for help. The best gift you can give to yourself is that of humility — it is where you discover the greatness in yourself and of those around you.

After Thanks, What Are You Giving?

To give thanks is not merely the act of gratitude; it is also the gift of sharing the bounty, as well.”

Someone got me on this thought the other day. With the celebration of Thanksgiving just around the corner, it seemed as good a time to share this with you.

A beggar was sitting by the side of the road when a successful businessman walked by. The beggar caught the man’s attention and he reached into his pocket and handed him a $5 bill. The beggar thanked him and he went on his way. The following week, the businessman happened across the same beggar. This time the man reached into his pocket and handed the beggar two $1 bills. As the man started to walk away the beggar called out to him and said, “What’s up? Last week you gave me $5. This week you gave me $2.” With that the businessman looked at him and said, “Sorry, I had a bad week,” and walked away.

Many of you may be thinking about the nerve of the beggar not being satisfied with either gift, no matter how generous. Let me offer an alternative thought: Is what you give dependent upon how things are going? Was an additional $3 really going to make that much of a difference to the businessman? Could his week have really been that bad? Do the size of our gifts need to be connected to how well we are doing?

This is a great thought as we prepare for the holiday season. It is not always easy to give of ourselves. Sometimes it seems that we have more time, more energy, or more money to give. And, when the timing is right, it is always easy to give more. What happens to our giving when the time isn’t right? Do we change our commitment, our giving, our support just because things aren’t going good enough for us?

As you take time to give thanks for what you have, for your journey, for your blessings, and for your gifts we need to always be prepared to share those gifts with others. While it may not always be easy to be there for someone else, we would hope and expect others to be there for us when we need them. It is being aware of our obligation to love, support, educate, help, and guide through our gifts that will change the world. Being committed to sharing our gifts and talents and lessons with others is not dependent on having a good week, it is dependent upon our willingness to be there regardless of the circumstances.

As you celebrate this Thanksgiving remember these two things: Your gratitude for all that you have, all that you are, and all that you have learned. And, your willingness to give and to share these lessons, experiences, and gifts with others whenever the opportunity arises. We can all make a significant different in our lives and in the lives of those around us when we reach out to appreciate and offer our gifts.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Managing the Off Switch

“Live in the moment to create and celebrate the time you are given to do what you love and become who you have been called to be.”

A few weeks ago I had a great conversation with someone who asked me how I was able to turn the switch off in my head. Their challenge, primarily as it related to their work, was they found themselves constantly churning thoughts in their head about all the things they need to do, should do, have to do, etc. The result of all this perpetual, non-stop thought is exhaustion. They were trying to understand how I managed the challenges of running my business and all the pressures I face on a regular basis without letting this head chatter devour me.

The answer I offered seems almost too simple – I focus solely on where I am and what I am doing at that time. Essentially, I live in the moment. When I am relaxing and watching football on TV that is what I focus on. When I ride my bike, I leave my work behind. When I am with my family, they get all my attention. And, when I am alone with my thoughts, I focus on what I have decided I want and need to zone in on. If it is work, then that is what I zero in on. If not, then I don’t. And, if I am having trouble turning off the switch, I go to the gym and physically push myself to a limit that breaks me out of the “on” mode and leaves me too exhausted or tired to even get my brain in gear.

It has become pretty easy for me to turn off my switch. When given the opportunity or the responsibility to engage in an activity other than our work, our business, or our jobs, we have an obligation to ourselves and others to do so. Taking a break from the perpetual cycle of stress, thought, pressure, and urgency is a gift that we owe to ourselves. Without a break, we cannot reload, recharge, or break clear enough to get creative or innovative. It is that break which enables us to connect with those people and activities that are most essential to our overall health, happiness, and well being. Turning off the switch is not an option – it is required.

Over fifteen years ago, I entered an Executive MBA program that demanded an extra 20 hours a week of my time. Already unbalanced and obsessed in my career, the additional hours simply meant more time away from my family – something I was easily ready to do. When I started missing out on more and more family events, my youngest son, Brandon, started acting out in school because his dad was never home – he was right. Although I did make a token effort to spend more time with him, I am certain I didn’t commit much as I was very focused in my career. Although I defended my right to focus on what I did, the expectation that I evaluate my time allocations didn’t go away.

During this same period, the company I was working for was going through a very difficult period, as well. The demands on my time and energy in that area were significant. Despite the distractions of school, I was able to accomplish a great deal at work. Upon completion of my MBA, I discovered that despite the demands of 20 hours of my time away from work, neither the business nor my performance there had suffered – in fact, I engineered and executed an incredible turnaround strategy while in school.

That is when I realized that success comes through a focused effort, not an obsessively unbalanced one. I gave the 20 hours of my MBA life back to me and my family and have never looked back. I have continued to be professionally successful, have an incredible relationship with my children, and have fun doing whatever it is I committee to, and am able to be remarkably creative, intense, and innovative without much effort.

Being the person you have been called to be requires the ability to focus on what is most important, when it is most important. Enjoy where you are when you are there, celebrate the moment, and focus only on what matters at that time. It is from this balance that you develop and sharpen your whole being.

In Life There is No Neutral

“Since everything around you is in perpetual motion, standing still allows everything to pass you by.”

I have been sharing my thoughts on 100 Pedals for nearly ten months now. There are several messages and beliefs that I have consistently and, hopefully, clearly shared with you. The theme of my messages is that we all have been blessed with a unique set of gifts and talents that others are looking for and need. And, by leveraging, believing in, and sharing our gifts we are in a position to have a significant impact on our lives and the lives of others. While we may not yet clearly know or understand what those special skills and abilities are, we do have an obligation to try to discover what they are by getting connected and being engaged in doing something. For, it is in the action phase we will become more aware of what truly inspires and energizes us and will expose us to that which we were called to do.

Recently I heard a presentation where the speaker shared his thoughts on this exact concept. His thoughts, his ideas, and his examples reminded me of the importance of our gifts and talents. He called on the audience to take action to make a difference in the world. He called on those in attendance to recognize their obligation to take action and put their life in gear to change the world. As I was listening to this talk, my heart filled with energy and joy and I had tears in my eyes. For, nothing is more inspiring to me than to realize I have an opportunity to join with others to make a difference and change the world.

Earlier this year I read a book by Will Marre called “Save the World and Still Be Home for Dinner.” The book, like this recent presentation, challenged people to recognize what their gifts and talents are; and, to use these unique abilities to change the world. The problems we face in our world today are, in many ways, not solvable by any one single or simple answer. However, they can be addressed through the collaborative and collective energies of the many unique talents that everyone brings to the problem. In his book, Marre reminds us that by discovering and leveraging our unique gifts we can change our world and create a movement of change and improvement that will make a difference. However, nothing happens if we don’t take action.

It doesn’t matter whether you know what you want to be or not; or know where you are going or not. What matters most is that you make that commitment to take action to put yourself out there and begin to engage in making and inspiring change. You do not need the answers or have the ideas for the solution – all you need to bring with you is your commitment to connect with others to make a difference. Who you really are and who you have been destined to be will reveal itself, for your strengths, skills, and abilities will be called into action. Take your life out of neutral and get into action. Going forward to an unknown destination is much better than going backward while you wait for an answer.

What are you waiting for? The time to take action in your life is now! While you may be waiting to do something – for a variety of reasons – standing in neutral is actually moving backwards. There are only two gears in life – forward and backward. Not going forward means you are actually and unintentionally going backwards.